Inspiration gave Funky and Fresh a swift kick to a painful area. The two young men formed a band called Funky Fresh and the Steer. They were more of a boy band, since they didn't play instruments. They simply wrote songs about Spam, and other joys of being a freshman in high school. That summer, Funky and Fresh met up with Mr. Tambo and Guido. They didn't actually meet them, because they'd known each other for a long time, but it adds drama. Mr. Tambo was a gifted percussionist and Guido would add his expertise on keyboards, while Funky and Fresh would sing. Our heroes realized that would pretty much be Ace of Base all over again, and that would suck worse than Elton John on New Year's Eve.
After Funky Fresh and the Steer's first album was devoured in a scandal in which it was proven that the compact disc was actually a Playstation demo disc, the band was put in dire straights. Then came along the band's good buddy Strat. He was a decent guitarist who loved to rock hard, and wanted to follow in the footsteps of the Mighty Mighty Bosstones. Thus, Funky Fresh and the Steer was transformed into a ska-core band as Funky and Fresh grabbed their trombones to add a kickin' horn section. Bassist Darts was added to round out the rhythm section, and things were looking good for the FFATS chicos.
Then, tragedy struck. Guido never got to play with the band, because he actually had a life. Fresh was grounded for bad grades in Chemistry. Strat broke his wrist, and was forced out of action for two months. To top it all off, the band was booted out of its practice space. Our heroes were forced to call it quits after a few months of practicing.
However, Mr. Tambo refused to back down from his dream. Strat's other project went nowhere, and he found himself desperately wanting to rock again. Thus, the dream was reincarnated in the form of the Lexington Punk Squad. Funky became the permanent lead vocalist and also played the t-bone. Fresh became the anchor of a revamped horn section, which saw the additions of The Man on trumpet and Slim on trombone. Taking a page out of They Might Be Giants' playbook, the wall of horns became the band's trademark. (Much to the delight of Mr. Tambo, whose favorite band is TMBG.) Dex joined the crew on bass, to replace the departed Darts. After a summer of songwriting and practicing, LPS discovered that they could hold their own on a stage. On September 15, our heroes made their public debut at Berean Baptist Church's post-football game throwdown called 5th Quarter.
Soon, the guys of LPS realized that their name sucked. After months of deliberation, a good name could not be discovered. Suddenly, it hit them. NO TIME TO LOSE. Thank you Monty Python. The band continued to make noise, but after a moderate run as top band in the area, internal fighting broke the band apart.
In early 2003, however, Strat and Mr. Tambo began to speak of a reunion, spurred onwards by severe boredom and lack of rocking. The rest of the crew, with the exception of Dex, has rejoined for the greater good of the general public. While discussing their future, the group unanimously decided that the whole "stage name" idea was rather silly; the members no longer hide behind crazy pseudonyms.
This is the history of No Time To Lose, the world's premiere bonecore experience. They're available for parties, bar mitzvahs, weddings, funerals, baby showers, award shows, and Economics USA videos featuring economic analyst Richard Gill.
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